I remember Grandma when I was growing up. She was a cheerful and loving person...all the things you would expect of a grandmother. Her freezer was always full of Eskimo Pies and her refrigerator stocked with Welchade. She knew that her grandchildren could tell the difference between Bumble Bee tuna and the other brands. It sounds trite, but she cared about pleasing us with the little things. When I was growing up Grandma from Babylon was always there. She always had time to pick flowers, Grandpa's tomatoes and cucumbers or play a game of shuffleboard. Many of her grandchildren like me visited her during the summer to swim or fish in the Carl River. I don't know who enjoyed those visits more?

When my mother and Corky did things boring to boys my age and went dress shopping, she was always willing to indulge us with hide and seek providing we agreed to stay away from the suit of armor in the dress store called Beggs.

Then there was the time she took Jud or was it Josh and me to the Rodeo in Garden City. We all got sick on the cotton candy, but it was part of the fun. But I especially remember getting sick in her new Cadillac because she was worried over me and not the mess. I could tell she cared about me.

When I was growing up she made the most wonderful family parties for Chanukah and Thanksgiving. I know she wished there could have been more of those family gatherings, with her children and grandchildren all about her house.

There are countless stories I remember about Grandma that make me feel good about her. I will tell you one more. I was no more than six years old. Grandma invited me to sleep over her house. As was the custom when I slept over she covered the picture of Grandpa's frightening-looking father in the guest bedroom. But that night it thundered worse then I can ever remember. Amidst the noisy storm she heard my whimpering and took me into her bedroom. I thought I was safe there, but then I heard what I could only imagine to be the biggest pig sleeping in bed with us. Terrified I nudged Grandma and asked if she knew there was a pig in bed with us. Well, she burst out laughing hysterically and temporarily silenced my pig which turned out to be a rather annoyed Grandpa.

Grandma had as voracious an appetite for good chocolates as she did for a book or a newspaper. I admired her for that. Grandpa did not especially appreciate all her reading but then she did not especially care for all his talk about real estate deals. I can still remember her special way of mimicking Grandpa as he spoke of Long Island Real Estate as if it were his mistress.

One of Grandma's best qualities was that she accepted people for what they were and wasn't overly critical, at least not in my presence. She was a quiet person, timid at times, and extremely private, and yet she knew how to make her opinion known. She was definitely liberal-minded for her time.

Memories of loved ones like grandma are important. Family was so very important to grandma and grandpa. Grandma was always recounting to me, sometimes to the point of my total and complete exasperation, the accomplishments of all her grandchildren. She was extremely proud of her family.

I think it is important that we all remember Grandma during her better times. The times when she was the loving kind-hearted matriarch of our family, the understanding wife, mother, grandmother, great grandmother and friend. The times before Alzheimers or whatever got the best of her and took hold of her kindred spirit and body and cheated her, and all of us, her family and friends of her love and kindness.

Grandma's long illness was devastating to all of us, and yet I attribute her sickness to a miraculous change in Grandpa. After years of marriage and disagreeing to agree on most everything Grandpa became the most caring person and loving husband. I think, by instinct, he took over the loving role that grandma had always held as if he were compensating for her inabilities. The joy and love Grandpa enjoyed giving during his last years may have been her gift to him and all of us.

We are all thankful to Corky and Steve for doing what we could not, providing a good home to Grandma who deserved so much and gave to us all.

God bless you Grandma, we miss you.

D. Justin Niles

November 9, 1988